Short Story Part V: The Call

I am happy to share my next installment of my running short story below. This has taken me some time to develop and put together and I can already say that I have felt some progress along the way.

What I have found interesting of the process of uploading my story bit-by-bit is that it has allowed me to revisit the world and give it some fresh air. Allowing myself to grow as a writer, giving myself time to leave a project and let the details settle in your mind--marinating on the world and characters that you created.

I get excited when I am able to give a new perspective on details that I couldn't see from the first draft. Believing in the process and trusting in the journey really becomes key to producing content and finding that unique voice--something that becomes crucial to achieving success.

Blogging my process has also been an interesting experience due to the opportunity of providing running commentary to every bit of the story. The platform to reflect on the choices I made and articulate some of the challenges I had to overcome has been valuable for me and perhaps helpful for you.

The installment below is really about overcoming dialogue and how to translate needed info without becoming overwrought with cringe-worthy exposition.

My greatest obstacle has been crafting real and authentic dialogue. Less is more really becomes the trick, trusting that your reader will put the pieces together.

It's all in the subtext. Human's are never honest. 

Let's hope I handled it well below.

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV

Part V

It was just past 3 AM when my cell phone rang.


“You running late?” I answered. 


It cracked on the other end, “They've been eyeing me. They already thinking that I'd get to you.”

  
“Well what's the play? Three days and no movement. Not good."

“I’m up the trail.”


I saw the headlights casting an ominous glow across the forest landscape; a beacon of hope in the uncertain darkness. 


“Pull up around back," I said.


Angela was groggy and dazed as she entered the kitchen. 

“What is it?” Angela whispered half cognoscente.


“Just get your coat on.” I'm starting to feel my pulse race.


“Did he just show up?”


“Yes, that’s why we’re leaving. Wait for me in the living room. I have to go to the cellar for one last thing.  


“Oh," Angela is disappointed. 


“You knew what this was going to be. Quick and sudden.”


“Yes, I know but...why now?”


"I just told you. He called fifteen minutes ago.”


“He’s three fucking days late and he just now show’s up, in the middle of the night. What has he been doing this whole time? ”

“Look, the guy's that are after us, they watch every angle. Every freeway, every bus, every airport. When they're after somebody for fifty large, anyone who knows us is a bargaining chip. My boy is risking his neck for us."

Angela ' s eyes well up with tears again. But before I let her say anything. 

"I’m leaving your shoes and coat here when you’re ready. I have to go down stairs.”

I grab my jacket and run out the back door.


Comments

Popular Posts